Happier Ever After?

I love happy endings. I like fairy tales, but I don't like how they create a false reality. Before hubby and I got married, we were counseled a lot. They told us that marriage was work. And even though I nodded my head, I didn't believe them. How could it be work to love someone? *insert laughter here*

Love, no matter how starry-eyed, is work. It's sacrifice and letting go. It's forgiveness and hope. It's wading through hard conversations until you work things out. It's realizing life isn't all about you. It's putting your preferences on hold to defer to someone else's. It's continuing to care even when the butterflies have a day off. It's choosing kind words when you want to spit and patience when you want to slam doors. It's walking alongside when you're not sure where the road goes. It's cleaning the kitchen when you'd rather take a nap. It's listening when you're mind is racing. It's reaching for his hand when your day's been hard too.

I think the truth about love isn't told enough. I consider my marriage to be a strong one, but we still argue. We don't date as often as we should. We get caught up in "kid talk" instead of sharing our hearts. We still hurt each other in deep ways. We sometimes get it so wrong even after all these years. But...

He can make me laugh harder than anyone. He knows how deep I love our kids because he does too. He knows my angry face and when to steer clear. I know when he needs to decompress. He gets my art. I get his football. We hope the best for each other. We both screw it up sometimes.

Love is not all good or all bad. It's both. It's difficult and sweet. And despite what fairy tales say, no one lives happily ever after . . .

Maybe, just happier.